Let me first say that I really do like my doctor's office. However, I was really looking forward to today's appointment and when it didn't go as well as I had hoped, all my frustrations just flooded me.
Each time I've gone to an appointment, I've seen a different doctor. They do this so that when the day comes to deliver, you'll have at least met whichever doctor is on call that day. For the most part, the doctors I've seen already have been very pleasant and helpful. They've been women who don't make the appointment feel "clinical," and act interested in you as a person, not just an incubator for a fetus.
Today, I saw a male doctor. He came in, introduced himself, and said "I don't have your chart with me, but did you sign the paper work to have a Cystic Fibrosis test?" I wondered silently why the heck he didn't have my chart if he's my doctor... So I told him that I already HAD a CF test at the last appointment. So he did a crazy thing and went to check (no way!) my chart. Sure enough, it was done (and negative, by the way.) Then he asked me if I'd consented to the genetic screening. I told him I'd signed that form twice. So AGAIN he leaves to check my chart (why don't you just bring it with you??) and I had to sign a form again. He acted distressed that we'd missed the 11-13 week window of opportunity to do the screening, and said that I needed to make the decision quickly since the next window is 15-19 weeks (I'm 15 today.) What the heck!
So the kicker though, is that while he's babbling on about genetic screenings, he's got the doppler on my belly and was looking for the heartbeat. He held it there for all of about 10 seconds, and talked the whole time... so I got to hear nothing!!! At the end of the appointment I asked if he'd found the heartbeat and he nonchalantly replied "Yeah, that's what the sound was while we were talking-- I like to get two things done at once." I seriously wanted to kill him. I said something to the effect of "I was really looking forward to hearing it today, because even though I know everything is fine, it's reassurance for me while I can't feel the baby and have no symptoms." He chalked that up to it being my first pregnancy and the common second trimester lull with no symptoms.
Then he left... and left the door open! So I had to try and be subtle getting myself put back together. Granted it's an office of pregnant women, but still... I'm a pretty modest girl, and isn't is just common (considerate) practice to shut the effin' door when their's a patient in there?
Normally I'm not a complainer, but I'm really thinking of pulling someone aside at the office and making it clearly known that unless there is absolutely no other option, I do not want this guy to deliver my baby, dammit. Ugh!! Okay, I'm over it now.
These are the stories of our journey as a family -- specifically those of our son, Carter Frederick, who joined us on November 1, 2009 and has provided a non-stop roller coaster ride of emotions and entertainment ever since. We hope his stories entertain you as much as us!
Carter Frederick Cool
6 comments:
You have every right to refuse him. I wouldn't hesitate to tell them now so you don't have to see him at any future appointment.
What is up with not bringing in your chart???
ugh! that doctor sounds like a real a**hole. once at my office, the nurse came in to get my stats and then she asked me when the last time i got my period was........duh! i told her, 3 months ago considering i am pregnant. she admitted that she hadn't looked at my chart either. it was annoying. i am sorry that you had such a bad experience.
Happy Freakin Birthday huh?!? You should call and have him removed from your service. I'm proud of you for speaking up for yourself even if he was too dumb to realize what you were saying.
In medical school they can teach you many things, but bedside manner is something you either have or don't have. It is strange that someone without bedside manner would go into this field.
I agree that you should say something because the experience has so many unknowns that you should not have to worry about his lack of class making you upset.
I too would not have said anything at the moment eventhough I would have wanted to. I hope your next visit goes much better. -Elaine
You can absolutely not schedule appointments with him. There was one doctor in the practice I go to who had ZERO bedside manner (and after telling me he thought I only needed to gain 30 pounds -- WITH TWINS -- I decided never to see him again) -- so when I would schedule an appt, they would say, "How about Dec 20th with Dr. X?" I would say, "No thanks, I would rather not see him." And they would find a different day with a doctor I liked better. This is the same OB who -- when I was diagnosed with Pre-E at 31 weeks, asked if I just wanted to go ahead with a c-section that day. Ummm -- I was in no danger and the babies were doing great -- I told him that I had heard that 1 day in-utero was equal to 3 days in the NICU -- adn that I would rather stay pregnant for as long as possible, thank you very much! He also pushes for scheduled C's of twins b/c of the possible complications of delivering Baby B. Why schedule unnecessary surgery if both babies are vertex?? I am SO glad he wasn't the dr on call the night I had the boys!
You are in charge of your own care, and good for you for speaking up for yourself and your little guy/girl! Next time, when he has the doppler on your belly, you should SHHHHH the doctor and tell him that you really like to hear the HB -- they can't criticize you for that!
Don't have the screening done if you were considering it or haven't already. I'm not sure if your doctor was as up front about the risks or not, but there's actually like a 1 in 300? (i think, I can't remember off the top of my head) chance that the baby will DIE. That was a little too high for Stephanie and I. Plus you're not really in the risk factor zone until you're about thirty-five. I might seem pushy, sorry about that, but I really hate it when babies die needlessly. You know, I'm one of those "pro-lifers" you hear about on the news...
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